Why Do You Drink

You may not think you're a binge drinker but you could be easily exceeding your 14 units a week. So what's your excuse - and how can you cut back?

(1) It gives me confidence

You find parties scary, and are convinced you're duller than everyone else there. But after a glass or three, you're the belle of the ball - and you don't want to stop and crash back to earth.

Danger: It's an easy habit to get into: opening a bottle 'to get you in the mood,' then carry on, to maintain false confidence.

Cut Back: You lose social inhibitions when you drink, so you can end up out of control. You need to look at where your lack of self-esteem comes from, then start to build it up, through therapy or self-help books. It's likely that your social skills are fine: not everyone has to be the life and soul to be good company.

 

(2) Peer pressure

You never drink alone - but when you're out with friends or colleagues you find it impossible to say no to 'just one more'. You don't want to be boring - and you're scared they'll judge you.

Danger: You let friends dictate your booze intake.

Cut Back: If you find it hard to turn down booze, say you're on medication, or have to drive later. People will pressure you less than you think they will. Find something else to do while you drink, like pool, or pub quizzes. It will distract you and help you drink slowly.

(3) You're having fun

You're in your element at get togethers, and as you mingle, you barely notice you're drinking - but your glass is regularly topped up, and suddenly, you're drunk without knowing how.

Danger: If you go out regularly, you probably drink more than the safe limit - and you could end up out of control or ill.

Cut Back: It's easy to mistake growing drunkenness for having a good time. Keep your glass in your hand, so you can see when it's being topped up. Before you go decide that after a couple, you'll switch to soft drinks. And refuse top-ups until you finish what's in your glass so you'll have a good idea of how many you've had. And when to stop.

(4) It takes the edge off

You've had a hellish day, you've finally got the kids in bed, and all you can think about is downing that first, chilled glass of Pinot. Then the second, then the third..

Danger: In your imagination, the booze can make you feel instantly better. So every time you feel stressed or upset, it becomes an essential pick-me-up.

Cut Back: If you're consistently turning to booze to relax you, it's more than taking the edge off. There are much healthier options that give the same lift. People tend to say they're too tired to exercise, but it's an energizer - you'll feel better instantly. The key is to find an activity that shifts your mood: a good book, half an hour in the bath, or a walk can all be effective.

(5) It helps you escape

You're unhappy. Whether it's a bad relationship, money trouble or work stress, there's something you're desperate to escape and drinking removes the pain, temporarily.

Danger: This is the most dangerous reason. Most people become alcoholics because they can't cope with life without booze. And until you stop drinking to escape, nothing will get better.

Cut Back: It's time to face up to the problem. When you use chemicals to deal with stress, you're on the road to serious dependency. Part of recovery is learning to cope with pain. You could consider therapy or AA for support. Meditation and relaxation therapies like yoga may also help.

(6) It's a habit

You and your partner have a routine of a bottle with dinner every night and maybe another as you while away the evening. You don't feel drunk - but you feel hung over the next day.

Danger: You're drinking way over your recommended limits, but because it's with food, it feels perfectly civilized. And you wouldn't want your partner to drink alone, so you both reinforce the habit.

Cut Back: You have to break the habit with new routines. Go for a walk before dinner, go to the gym, or build activities around your kids. Designate a 'wine night' to enjoy a bottle together - but stick to the one. The main problem comes if a partner doesn't want to cut back. So share a glass over dinner, then make yourself a coffee or a tea. If he wants to drink, he can, but you've changed your pattern. Again, it's about deciding in advance how much you want to drink. If you wait till the bottle's open before you think about it, it's usually too late.