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Dumb
state laws in Florida |
- Women may be fined for falling asleep
under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
- A special law prohibits unmarried women
from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk
arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
- If an elephant is left tied to a parking
meter, the parking fee has to be paid just
as it would for a vehicle.
- It is illegal to sing in a public place
while attired in a swimsuit.
- Men may not be seen publicly in any kind
of strapless gown.
- Having sexual relations with a porcupine
is illegal.
- It is illegal to skateboard without a
license.
- When having sex, only the missionary
position is legal.
- You may not fart in a public place after
6 P.M. on Thursdays.
- It is considered an offense to shower
naked.
- You are not allowed to break more than
three dishes per day, or chip the edges of
more than four cups and/or saucers.
- Oral sex is illegal.
- You may not kiss your wife's breasts.
- Penalty for horse theft is death by
hanging.
- One may not commit any "unnatural acts"
with another person.
- Unmarried couples may not commit "lewd
acts" and live together in the same
residence.
- Corrupting the public morals is defined
as a nuisance, and is declared a misdemeanor
offense.
- Doors of all public buildings must open
outwards.
- It is illegal to sell your children.
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The state constitution allows for
freedom of speech, a trial by jury, and
pregnant pigs to not be confined in cages.
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